from now on my penis is your penis
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Randomize