You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
