If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize