im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
