he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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