it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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