Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
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