Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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