I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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