I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
