So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
The Olympian is in my bed
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
