He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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