i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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