it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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