Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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