About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
