What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
