I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
