You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
