..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
