hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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