party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
My vagina is officially offended.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
