She announced her abortion via fbk
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
