i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
either way he was missing a nipple.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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