My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
