the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
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