Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize