Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
she looked like the before picture.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm getting married
To pizza
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
