I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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