So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
