I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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