ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I wanna passion pit in your ass
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
