you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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