this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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