i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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