honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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