Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
only you would photoshop your dick
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
