so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize