just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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