Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
