Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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