K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
