I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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