how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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