She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
