How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
