at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
