Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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