Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
