She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
