I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
