the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
