you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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